


Star Trek TNG: Getting Picard's Goat

by Pokejedservo



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-30
Updated: 2018-01-30
Packaged: 2019-03-11 13:03:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13524840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pokejedservo/pseuds/Pokejedservo
Summary: Hey folks I thought I do a little something different here as I have been watching episodes from Star Trek The Next Generation Season 1 DVD set that I got for my Older Brother last Christmas. So I had a little idea here for a skit that I thought I would share with you all just for fun.





	Star Trek TNG: Getting Picard's Goat

Star Trek TNG: Getting Picard’s Goat

(In the USS Enterprise’s Bridge, Captain Jean Luc Picard is seen trying to explain something to Lt. Commander Data.)

Picard: You see Data, while it is true that like 1st Officer Commander Riker you have given me moments of irritation. However I am a bit more patient with you Data as while you have a rather verbose but well-intentioned inquisitive nature. *smirks at Riker* While Commander Riker on the other hand occasionally likes to get my goat every now & then.

Riker: Heh heh well yeah I suppose that is true.

(As Picard smirks at the smugly amused Riker as Data looks confused.)

Data: Oh my, this is rather curious, Commander Riker, as the Lt. Commander of the Enterprise I am aware of many things that go on in this ship and I assure you that Captain Picard does not have a goat in his possession.

Riker: Heh yes Data that is true but…

Data: However there must be an explanation for this odd situation, query, Captain Picard have you been secretly smuggling goats as a side hobby?

Picard: No Data, no I have not…

Data: I see, then perhaps this goat is female and you wish to protect it from Commander Riker’s advances? Sir, while Commander Riker may be rather affectionate to females I am fairly certain that Commander Riker would show some restraint in this situation.

(Then almost everyone on the bridge tries not to laugh except for Riker who is rolling his eyes in slight annoyance.)

Picard (trying to stifle a chuckle): Oh no Data I assure you I do not have any goats in my possession at all thank you. But to be fair considering some of Commander Riker’s certain proclivities your concerns do seem rather legitimate, don’t you agree Commander Riker?

Riker (smirking at Picard): No sir I don’t believe I can, though Data for the record I would indeed show restraint in this situation I assure you.

Data: I see…

Geordi LaForge: I believe what the Captain is trying to say is that Commander Riker occasionally likes to rile Captain Picard up in light jest to amuse himself, Captain Picard was just simply expressing it through a colorful euphemism.

Data: I see, though I do wish that humans do not rely on Euphemisms in their speech so much, it can make communication fairly difficult.

Picard: Perhaps that can be true Data; however Euphemisms and other forms of slang can give our words a certain sense of style and personality. Oh sure they could be used in crude and vulgar ways but they can also make you appear witty, charismatic, sophisticated and intellectual if you use them well.

Data: Fascinating…

Riker: Oh don’t mind Captain Picard there Data, he has a strong… proclivity in using highly antiquated and dated euphemisms. He likes to think they make him feel intellectual but they often help showcase his somewhat advanced age. I’m sure you understand.

(Data appears to be fascinated by this as an annoyed Picard smirks at a rather smug Riker as he tauntingly smiles at Picard.)

END


End file.
